Three Steps to Building Self-Esteem

Having low self-esteem can lead to you missing many opportunities. You might be familiar with the following situations: going into a job interview and turning into a sweating, stuttering mess and then having the interviewer ask you a simple question, which you have completely forgotten the answer to, leading to you being turned down for the job that you know you are perfect for; blabbering through a conversation with a person you are really attracted to, blowing your chances with them.

Building self-esteem is one of the most beneficial things that you can do for your personal growth. This is for the simple reason that having self confidence makes the things in your life much more enjoyable.

So, to avoid missing out on opportunities in the future, follow these three simple steps to building self-esteem.

1.  Seek Your Own Council

There will always be external circumstances or opinions that try to tear you down, so building self esteem starts with looking to yourself when it comes to affirming your self worth. Think about it: even some of the most well respected people in the world are still often criticized and mocked by others. However, someone with high self confidence will always seek their own council above anyone else’s – they do not give other people, or exterior circumstances, power over them.

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TIP: Start taking note of how often you let external circumstances or others’ opinions to influence your self confidence. This will make you more aware of this unhealthy pattern and give you a chance to interrupt it and make some positive changes.

2.  Have a Definite Purpose

Having a purpose that you can focus your energy on is very helpful to building self esteem that is infallible. Becoming more decisive is a natural result of having a purpose, and this is a sign of strong self confidence. Think of the people you know who are insecure and do not know what they want – chances are they are indecisive as a result.

Finding a purpose may seem like an immense challenge at first, but once you start paying more attention to yourself and drowning out the external ‘noise’ that would pull you down, it becomes so much easier.

TIP: Start keeping a daily journal. It helps to write down any questions about what your purpose is – don’t try to answer them, only write them down and whatever else comes to mind. This will keep your thoughts clear and allow you to develop a better idea of what your purpose is.

3: Change Your Inner Dialogue

The way that you talk about yourself has a direct influence on your self confidence. You know how easily a person’s self confidence can be ruined if you talk badly about them, or conversely how easily you can build their confidence up if you compliment them. This is even truer when it comes to the way you talk to and think about yourself – as you have to listen it 24/7. Because of this, changing your inner dialogue is very important to building self esteem. You can do this by using positive affirmations, and the easiest way to develop these is to think how you would speak to another person if you were trying to boost their confidence. Simply write down your answers and read them out loud each day, morning and evening. Looking yourself in the eye in the mirror while you do this is very effective.

So, go and put these strategies into practice. Soon your self esteem will be growing, making it easier for you to use your natural skills and talents – which have probably been hidden for years!


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